As a parent of a “failure to thrive” child, weight checks are not my favorite thing. The scale taunts me as if it is the measure of how successful I am at caring for my son. It reminds me of how far we have to go. It has the ability to completely crush me. A tiny scale has the possibility of sending me home from an appointment in tears.   At our last appointment the nurse asked if we could get a weight check as I wheeled him to the exam room. “Yes, as soon as I undress him” was my response. His pediatrician would like very accurate weight checks…

“God only gives you what you can handle.” People often say this when they don’t know what else to say. As a mom of a complex child this phrase has been uttered to me many times with a gentle smile. At first you want to believe that God hand-picked you for a rewarding task. God believes in ME more than he believes in you, which must be the case since you don’t have a medically fragile child. You were not chosen to live this life. This life of inescapable worry, beeping machines, and constant therapy. Tears in the car after an appointment, sobbing until snot runs down your face in…

Raising a child with special needs is a lot like being stuck in traffic. You’re driving along and then all of a sudden you see the brake lights illuminate on the cars in front of you. Then you slow to a stop. This is not what I planned for at all. I’m not prepared for this. I thought I did everything right and left the house with ample time but I guess not, and to be honest, I’m angry. I start to feel anxious and wonder when we’ll start moving again. I worry about being late to my destination. I try to look ahead to determine what the holdup is,…